What’s wrong with your face?-

I head to my 8:50 class preparing to teach the students how to write and successfully give a lesson. I get to class and the assistant school director calls me outside and proceeds to tell me about all the many problems with my proposal to start a theater group. I am trying to explain in my broken Portuguese why I am right and he is wrong, when another teacher enters my classroom and begins to teach. She basically tells me that I am stupid in front of my students because I mixed up the hours and missed my earlier class. I head home accomplishing nothing and PMS causes me to have an emotional reaction that turns from tears of frustration to a wrath of hatred in just a few moments (a lil dramatic eh?). I grab my schedule and proceed back to MY class to show my colleague that I am not an idiot, we, in fact, are both signed up for the same time. TAKE THAT!

As far as my group goes, I have to fix yet another small, meaningless detail and print yet another copy before they will grant me permission to even start the group- 4^TH TIMES A CHARM! And even after I turn the damn paper in again, I still have to wait for the big head honcho to approve. It’s not looking good! You would think I was asking to start a drug-makin’ club and not a theater group! Mozambican school politics are out of this world! The hierarchy system makes me crazy sometimes!

My most frustrating day in Moz over, I move on to other challenges like being told I can’t play volleyball by a student or having another student ask- “why can’t you speak Portuguese?” Making me want to scream- WHY CAN’T YOU SPEAK ENGLISH!!!! YOU HAVE HAD YEARS OF ENGLISH. I HAVE HAD ONLY A FEW MONTHS OF PORTUGUESE!!! AAAAGGGGHHHHH!!! Of course I don’t because I am a patient and caring teacher- eh?

One thing I am slowly getting used to (or more frustrated by) is that Mozambicans like to say exactly what they think when they think it. And I mean anything- really! Here are a few great examples:

 

-What is wrong with your face? Did you go to the doctor? (about my pimples).

-You are getting too fat- you should exercise (about a friend’s weight)

-Gordinha or little fat girl- you need to run more (about my slightly larger Mozambican 4 year old neighbor)

-Can you buy me a beer, you can afford it because you are white (a police officer to us at a restaurant)

-Can you translate for her- she can’t understand (a colleague assuming because I can’t speak port. I can’t understand it either- NOT TRUE! I am actually very good at understanding!)

-Can I have a candy- (kids on the street because we are white and must always have candy for them)

- Baby, I love you-or Do you want to have sex? (because everyone wants to sleep with the white girls and oh boy do we liked to be asked that question by complete STRANGERS!!!!!!!)

Etc…

In some ways it is nice that they are brutally honest and judgmental. You don’t have to guess anything. It is very different than the politically correct environment of the United States where we judge people all to hell, but only in our heads or behind their backs- eh?

On to another day!